Have you ever taken the time to edit your sales emails before you click send? Not just reading it over once for spelling and grammatical errors; really reading it to check if you could have worded something better, left out a crucial bit of information, etc. Rob Reinalda, writing for Ragan, says that if you’ve edited your message correctly, you’ll have cut at least a few sentences in half.
Your clients are just as busy as you are. You know this, and yet you’re probably embellishing your emails more than you realize. Reinalda lists some classic examples of sentences that have unnecessary words that can easily be cut out.
“I’m currently looking for…”
Cut the word “currently.” It’s unnecessary. You’re expressing an interest in what you’re looking for in an email the prospect just received. They know you’re looking right now.
“Over a period of three months…”
If you changed that sentence to, “Over three months,” it would mean the same thing and save you both space in your email and your prospect's time while reading.
“If you have the opportunity, do this.”
You’re giving your readers an out using this overly long sentence. Instead, say, “Do this.” That is to-the-point and is not passive like its longer counterpart. Show that you know what you’re doing. Be assertive and concise.
Reinalda also says that you can cut your sentences down by substituting a slew of words with one or a few more powerful ones. For example, “One of the most important aspects is…” can be changed to “One crucial aspect is…” You’re not only shortening the sentence, you’re doing so using a more attention-drawing word. “Most important” obviously shows that something is significant, but “crucial” implies that the referenced aspect is both needed and its absence can have negative consequences. Just like forgetting to edit your emails completely.