BY Tim Londergan
Productivity was on her mind when my grandmother didn’t want my pre-teen friends helping me work in her yard. Willingly, they’d bike over to help me mow and rake so we could be off to more thrilling adventures. She argued that “two boys are worth half-a-boy, and three boys are like no boys at all!”
I admit she was right. It’s not that they were difficult co-workers. It’s just that we’d fool around and cause more problems than we’d solve. Today’s office workers can be equally disrupting so it’s wise to be aware of energy vampires draining your productivity.
Difficult Co-workers Lack Self-Awareness
Nandini Maharaj, PhD, interviews two therapists for an article in SELF that helps identify and deal with energy vampires. Perhaps you have a workmate who seeks attention and gains energy by monopolizing the conversation. As you finally break away, you feel emotionally drained and dazed at the thought of your next task.
These difficult coworkers aren’t deliberately trying to ruin your day, they’re just unaware of the impact of their intrusiveness. Nonetheless, when you’re on the receiving end, you realize how they’ve disrupted your productivity and affected your attitude. Likely, you’re frustrated, tired and emotionally exhausted and you’re determined to act.
Break the Pattern of Behavior
Typically, being a supportive co-worker helps everyone achieve more and makes for a pleasant office environment. However, when you’re the willing listener with too many emotional visitors during the day, you’ve got to speak up. Protecting your productivity and directing energy to your own needs can break this pattern of behavior.
Here are some ways to do that:
Listening and limiting
Be supportive and tolerant as they vent for a few minutes. Sometimes people just need to hear their thoughts out loud. As appropriate, tell them of your deadline and offer another time to discuss their issue.
Validate and redirect
Listen to understand their issue and respond with empathy. Validate their concern and suggest ways they could resolve the issue. Remind them of their options to act or seek help.
Control your reactions
Don’t escalate the drama. Be aware of your body language and facial expressions. Show the energy vampires that you will not supply their needs.
Difficult Co-workers Require Consistent Boundaries
Just as strong fences make good neighbors, proper communication builds trust with co-workers. That persistent workmate bending your ear will only be satisfied if you take a moment to acknowledge them. Likewise, you’ll need to let them know what to expect from you.
When difficult co-workers try to steal your time it’s best to be professional, courteous and clear with your expectations. Be authentic to your style of communication but don’t hesitate to be direct. Physically, it’s possible to show your intentions by leaving your workspace.
Some Office Behaviors are Simply Annoying
According to a survey cited by HubSpot, the five most annoying co-worker behaviors are:
- Interrupting 48%
- Taking credit for someone else’s work 47%
- Oversharing 45%
- Not doing their work 42%
- Arrogance 41%
Stealing a co-worker’s time or productivity did not make the top-five annoyances but it’s still a problem. It requires us to recognize the culprits, deal with them appropriately and be accountable for our own production. And as we try to make the most of our work life, we go along to get along.
Being a great co-worker is our responsibility to others and our employer. Self-awareness matters just as keeping tabs on behavior that may rub others the wrong way. Still, difficult co-workers who monopolize our time and take advantage of our willingness to listen are not appreciated.
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