When It’s OK to Delay Tough Conversations in Sales

Sellers will always have to face tough conversations, whether it’s with a prospect or a colleague. Communication is important and these talks are necessary. But, sellers should also know when to wait to have them, as timing can be important. 

Tough conversations are a necessary part of sales

Smart reps know that avoiding unpleasant tasks isn’t the best choice. This is especially true when it involves communicating with others. 

Communication is one of the most important elements of a relationship. Effective sales communication can help build rapport, foster understanding and encourage loyalty. And skirting around issues or uncomfortable topics helps no one. 

Having these difficult discussions can clear up misunderstandings and strengthen relationships. It can also open participants up to different perspectives and uncover new insights. 

As SalesFuel notes, “Salespeople can navigate these conversations expertly and even guide them to a favorable outcome.”

But it’s important to know that sensitive topics should be discussed thoughtfully. 

When to delay a difficult conversation

“Starting conversations at the wrong time can escalate problems,” writes Marlene Chism. 

In her article for SmartBrief, she highlights specific scenarios in which pausing a tough talk can be helpful. Sellers should learn to recognize these instances to make sure their communications are effective. And the primary reason to delay? High emotions.

The first instance she discusses is pausing talks when you’re angry. Emotions are strong and often, can’t be reigned in. Even if you try to speak neutrally, it can be difficult to hide feelings of anger and resentment.

And often, anger fuels a sense of urgency. You likely feel the urge to say how you feel immediately. But anger can also impact your ability to make rational decisions.

“The executive function of your brain (prefrontal cortex) shuts down, and decision-​making suffers,” Chism explains. 

“The primal brain takes center stage and is mostly concerned with survival, winning and being right…”

In other words, you likely won’t make attempts at collaboration or course correction. And this won’t lead to effective communication with the other person. When you’re feeling angry, it’s recommended to hit pause to cool down. 

This may mean taking a walk, listening to a quick meditation, or even sleeping on it. Take the time needed to let your anger ebb and give way to calm thinking. This is an important skill for sellers to learn. 

“Getting control over your emotions and the thoughts in your head takes patience and practice,” Carole Mahoney writes for LinkedIn.

For suggestions on managing your emotions, take a look at these helpful tips.

And as Chism points out, once you feel better, don’t forget the issue that caused those high emotions. 

“Your anger signals a problem; something needs to be addressed at the appropriate time, not something to brush over.”

Pause if the other person is upset

Having a tough conversation is also less likely to be productive if the other person is emotional. In this scenario, even if you’re calm, you should delay if the other person is angry, hurt or otherwise agitated. 

You may feel like you can help or make them feel better. But likely, the talks won’t be effective. You’ll likely take the brunt of their emotions or walk on eggshells to avoid upsetting them further. 

“Recognize that their emotions, feelings and interpretations belong to them, not you,” Chism explains. 

“Acknowledge the emotion…and suggest resuming the conversation after a small break.”

That break, can be minutes or days, depending on how the other person is able to manage their own emotions. 

When you do continue, it’s important to tap into your emotional intelligence. Tough conversations require empathy, active listening and reading the other person. These soft skills ensure that the delayed discussion continues on the right path. 

For more tips on how to approach tough conversations, consider these other useful insights. And remember, avoiding discussions is never the answer. But delaying them can be the best choice for everyone.

Photo by Vitaly Gariev